October 05, 2023

Ten Steps to Beating Burnout: A Guide to a Better Life

October 05, 2023/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/ Roland Legge

We live in a chaotic world. It is hard to separate our work and business life because of smartphones, computers and social media. Beating burnout is a lifelong process.

People expect to hear back immediately when they text or email you. Organizations pressure their employees to produce and expect them to work overtime at home.

Churches put more pressure on their leaders to keep their doors open. As congregations decline, more expectations are put on their ministers.

How pressured do you feel to work on your days off and your holidays? Do you fear losing your job if you don’t put in the extra hours?

More people realize that it is not a badge of honour to overwork.

July 15, 2023

Understanding the Difference Between Coaching and Counselling

July 15, 2023/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/ Roland Legge

Coaches and counsellors have much in common, yet understanding the differences is essential.

Each practitioner brings something unique to their practice. Whether you choose a coach or counsellor, you must find someone you can trust and feel comfortable sharing.

April 20, 2023

Five Ways to Cultivate a Healthy Masculinity and Femininity

April 20, 2023/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/ Roland Legge

We live in a complex world, yet we want to divide people into two genders. We expect men to be masculine and women to be feminine.

With modern psychology, we have learned that we have both within us. It is a like a continuum with masculinity and femininity at either end of the spectrum. Most of us land in the middle of the continuum. We all need a healthy masculinity and femininity.

Until recently, children have been raised to behave in specific ways depending on their gender identity. Girls were brought up to be caring, maternal, gentle and obedient to parents, particularly men.

Boys were considered tough, assertive, violent, and controlling. Boys grew up with the belief that they were superior to girls. You still hear the excuse for male violence with the saying, “Boys will be boys.” We still see signs of this in our society with a high rate of violence against girls and women.

Women and men are both hurt by this sexist divide. We are forced into being people we are not. When women are not permitted to be strong, assertive and outspoken, they often take out their anger on other women.

March 09, 2023

9 Ways to Detox Your Soul through your Body, Heart and Mind

March 09, 2023/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/ Roland Legge

You are a complex being. Your life will flow when you pay attention to your soul. To do this work requires patience, determination and commitment. Doing a soul detox is difficult, but the results are life-changing.

The Enneagram is a great tool to help you do this work. It is like a spiritual map to show you how and the type of work you need to do. The Enneagram is not enough in itself. You must find practices that will help you connect with your soul through your body, heart and mind.

February 05, 2023

Finding God Within Ourselves

February 05, 2023/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/ Roland Legge

What is God

God is a big word. You and I have different images of God. When I refer to God, I am talking about an energy/force within and around you that connects everything, both animate and inanimate.

It is the higher power within us that speaks to us through our bodies (sensations), hearts (emotions) and heads (quiet mind).

God is a loving force that seeks to bring out the best in each of us and sustain a world where all life has a chance to thrive.

There is the spark of God in each of us. It is not something we earn. It is a gift given to us to be used wisely and with compassion.

The good news is that God is within all of us.

January 21, 2023

Why Being Self-Loving Makes You a Better Partner

January 21, 2023/ REL Consultants (Spiritual Life Coach and Enneagram Teacher)/ Roland Legge

What does it mean to love yourself and be a better partner? Have you found a way to love yourself while ensuring you meet all your needs? Can you love yourself as much as you love your partner and kids?

How good are you at loving yourself? Do you get plenty of sleep, eat healthy food, exercise, pay attention to your emotions, enjoy time with friends and family and get help when needed? How you answer this question will reveal your strengths and growing edges around self-love.

If you are struggling to care for yourself, first, you must get over the belief drilled into you as a child that you need to always put the needs of others before your own. The pressure to put others first is especially true for women who are expected to sacrifice themselves for the needs of their families.

You get into relationship problems when you expect others to meet your needs. The reality is that you are responsible for your happiness. When you love yourself, you ensure that you are getting your needs met. You are no longer relying on another person to make you okay. Being grounded in your body, heart, and head help you be a better partner.

In any relationship, you need balance. Yes, there will be times that you will happily go out of your way to help another person when they are having a rough time. It only becomes a problem when you are always the one to give up your life for them.

In a healthy relationship, there will be a balance over time. You will both be there to support and encourage each other. No one will take advantage of the other.

Here are Eight ways that loving yourself helps you to be a better partner:

January 13, 2023

9 Ways to Create an Amazing Life After Divorce

January 13, 2023/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/ Roland Legge

Acceptance

You entered your marriage thinking it would last the rest of your life. You had dreams of what it would be like to grow older together. All these dreams have now come to an end. After the divorce, what kind of life do you want?

Grief Work

When you accept that your marriage is over, you can begin the grieving process. Grieving takes time; sometimes, you will need help from a professional if you feel stuck in your emotions.

After you have done the work to ready yourself for your new life, you can begin the next chapter of your life.

Learning through the Enneagram

A great tool to help you renew your life is the psychological-spiritual tool called the Enneagram. The Enneagram comprises nine personality types, and you have all nine types within you. Each of us has one type we go to when we are stressed, and this is our personality type. Your type reveals to you the lens through which you see the world.

If you want to create an amazing life after the divorce, you will benefit from accessing the gifts from the nine types.

Here is how each of the nine types can help us to find new life after divorce:

December 15, 2022

The Ultimate Guide to Spirituality for Beginners

December 15, 2022/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/ Roland Legge

Spirituality is a big word.

What does it mean for you? There are many different ways to be a spiritual person.

You can be a spiritual person in and outside of religion. Spirituality is about recognizing and experiencing the life force that connects you with everything animate and inanimate. It connects you with a greater power that humans have given many names.

If you are part of a faith community, you might refer to this power as God, Allah, Goddess, Mohammad, Jesus, Budah and many more.

Religion and Spirituality

The major religions of the world have much to teach us about spirituality. No religion is better than another; they are just different.

They all came into being to help people live joyful, meaningful and purposeful lives. People who inspired the great religions of the world saw a need to build more caring and just communities.

What does it mean for you to be a spiritual person?

Religion is a powerful Source

Religion has done great things, such as ending slavery, providing education for all, standing up for civil rights, bringing down the iron curtain and more.

Also, terrible things happen in the name of religion, such as the crusade, antisemitism, promotion of slavery, division, extremist ideology, Islamaphobia and Christian nationalism.

Learn your Faith Tradition if you have One

If you are part of a faith tradition, find a person who can help you to learn your tradition, letting go of what no longer serves you and practising traditions that give you life. Each religion has a different lens to experience spirituality.

In the Abrahamic faiths (Judaism, Islam and Christianity), a good guide would be to follow the great commandment to love God with all your heart, be kind to yourself and love your neighbour as yourself.

Moving into the Secular World

As much of the world has become more secular, spirituality has taken on a life beyond the world's religions. I am going to focus on finding spirituality outside of organized religion.

The irony is that many practices used in the secular world have origins in religion.

How would you describe your understanding of what it means to be a spiritual person to a friend?

November 30, 2022

How Each Enneagram Type Can Build Healthy Habits

November 30, 2022/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/ Roland Legge

What is the Enneagram?

The Enneagram is a powerful tool for transformation. It can help you build healthy habits that will help you to be the best you can be.

Most people know the Enneagram as a personality typing system. Naming your personality type is a small part of what it is all about.

At its best, the Enneagram is a psychological-spiritual map to help you become self-aware, noticing the habits that no longer serve you and learning new ways of being that will bring you joy, purpose and the freedom to be your best self.

Your primary Type will never change—your levels of health shift which will impact how you show up in the world. As you get healthier in your Type, you will get stronger in all nine Enneagram types.

Want to Discover Your Enneagram Type? Click Here to Book your Free Enneagram Typing Session.

Learn to Observe Yourself in Action

With the help of the Enneagram and Coaching, you can learn how to observe yourself in action. Each Type will show you behaviours you need to watch out for and give clues on how you can make better choices that will help you create healthier habits.

This work is about creating new neural pathways that will get stronger every time you practice a new way of being that brings out the best in you. The stronger your neural pathways are, the easier it will be to build new habits that serve you.

Remember that you have all nine types within you so that you can learn from every Type.

November 12, 2022

Choosing Change Can Be Hard and Scary, but It's Worth It

November 12, 2022/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/ Roland Legge

Feeling stuck in life is a hard place to be

You get trapped in old habits that no longer serve you. Navigating life transitions can help you to get the best out of life.

Every time you choose the "devil you know versus the devil you don't know," you move further and further away from living the life the universe desire you to live.

The challenge is to get over the feeling of hopelessness and feelings of being helpless. Your inner critic is getting in the way of you moving ahead.

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