What is the Hardest Enneagram Type to Love?

/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/
What is the Hardest Enneagram Type to Love?

Some might say Enneagram Type Eight, the Challenger, is the hardest to love. At their average levels, the Challenger can be forceful and aggressive. They assert control over themselves and others. They will push even harder whenever they feel someone is trying to hold them back. Eights can be intimidating because they say whatever is on their mind. They don't care what other people think of them.

Eights feel vulnerable. Most people don't realize they are big-hearted people. Unfortunately, as a way to survive, they close their hearts down because they believe it is unsafe to be weak and vulnerable.

Average eights will hide their true feelings and expect people to try and control them. This wound sets up an in-balance of power, making it difficult for the couple to communicate and resolve conflict. The eight is always ready for battle, increasing the potential for severe conflict or the silencing of the non-eight partner.

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How to Transform Your Inner Critic into an Inner Coach

/ REL Consultants Coaching (Roland Legge)/
How to Transform Your Inner Critic into an Inner Coach

You have an Inner Critic:

The inner critic has good intentions. It wants to keep you safe. Unfortunately, it can become a problem because it wants to limit you to only doing what is familiar. You will notice that the negative voice of the inner voice gets louder whenever you are doing something new. Are you ready to move from listening to the inner critic to the inner coach?

The first step is to recognize when the inner critic is speaking. Until you become more self-aware, you won't likely notice the negative voice because it is all you hear. You are convinced this is the truth, so why fight it?

You will know the inner critic is talking because of the loud, impatient, demeaning, hostile and judgmental voice.

Over time you will learn to notice when your inner critic is active. Once you are aware this is happening, you can choose to have a conversation with this part of you and reassure this part of yourself that you are capable of taking good care of yourself.

You might want to give your inner critic a name so it will be easier to converse with this part of you. Be kind to this part of you because it wants to keep you safe. An excellent way to quiet your inner critic is by inviting it to use its energy for positive things, such as reminding you to slow down and breathe. Are you ready to move from listening to the inner critic to the inner coach?

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Out-of-sorts? How the Enneagram can Help

/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/
Out-of-sorts? How the Enneagram can Help

You are tired, stressed and overwhelmed. Inflation is making it hard to pay your bills every month. You wonder how the conflict between Russia and Ukraine will affect the world. You feel the growing divisions in your country, often dividing along political lines—you feel little hope for the world. You can begin your healing through the Enneagram.

Thankfully you don't have to stay stuck in hopelessness and despair. You don't have to pretend everything is good in the world. The answer lies in learning to access your nine motivations and three instincts.

The Enneagram gives us a map to inner wholeness. It reveals nine different motivations we all need to be healthy and shows you which one you get stuck in. It not only shows you where you get stuck, but it also offers you a way to freedom. Healing through the Enneagram can enhance your life.

The Enneagram also helps you find inner peace by teaching you how to strengthen your three biological drives (self-preservation, social and sexual), and this is what we will focus on in this article.

When you are healthy in your Enneagram type and balanced in your instinctual drives, you will have all you need to stay grounded during turbulent times. Healing through the Enneagram can help you to get the best out of life.

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6 Simple Steps To Building A Relationship With God

/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/
6 Simple Steps To Building A Relationship With God

How to connect with God. It takes time and intention to open yourself to the Spirit.

God is a big word; there is no one definition of God. God is a powerful source of wisdom beyond anything we can understand. God is the living energy/spirit that gives life to everything and connects you with everything.

God is much bigger than all the great religions of the world. Together, all of them help us to name the mystery of God. God has names such as Father, Friend, Oneness, Allah, YHWH, Jehovah, Elohim, Adonai, Hu, and El Shaddai. God is not something you can put in a box.

In Christianity, we even say that Jesus was God. There is nothing wrong with imagining God as a person as long as we do not limit our understanding. God needs to remain a mystery.

This loving, wise force we call God is within everything on earth, including you and I.

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Feeling Stuck? Five Tips for Managing Life Transitions

/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/
Feeling Stuck? Five Tips for Managing Life Transitions

The one thing that never stops is change. Ether, we adapt to the changing world or be doomed to a life of disappointment, anger and frustration.

Are you one of the many overwhelmed by all our responsibilities and the constant change in the world? You are not alone. Remember that life is in the transitions.

Are you feeling stuck in a job you don't enjoy because you are afraid of failing in something new? Are you in a relationship that sucks your life out because you fear being alone?

It is easy to get stuck in this lethargy. You are tired and do not feel like you have the energy or money to try something new. The good news is that there is a way out of this.

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Which Enneagram Types Get Along the Best (And The Worst)

/ REL Consultant (Roland Legge)/
Which Enneagram Types Get Along the Best (And The Worst)

The Enneagram can help you and your partner to have the best relationship possible. The Enneagram is a psychological-spiritual tool (map) to help you be your best. It will help you to know which enneagram types get along best with your type.

The enneagram symbol illustrates the power of the nine different personality types, representing the different ways we experience the world.

Once you discover your type, you will have a map to get healthier in all nine types. To thrive calls on you to be more mindful. The more self-aware you are gives you greater access to your wisdom which we all have.

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Now That Your Divorce Is Over, What Are You Looking For In A Relationship?

/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/
Now That Your Divorce Is Over, What Are You Looking For In A Relationship?

Your divorce is over, and you are wondering if you are ready to begin a new relationship. It is never wise to jump into a new relationship quickly. If you are honest with yourself, you will know when you are ready.

This in-between time is an excellent opportunity to reflect on this question: what are you looking for in a relationship? Take the time to learn from past relationships to clarify what you need and what would be nice.

Here are eight questions to ask yourself to help you name what you need in a relationship:

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When Divorce Becomes A Reality: How To Let Go Of A Dream & Move On With Your Life

/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/
When Divorce Becomes A Reality: How To Let Go Of A Dream & Move On With Your Life

How do I let go of a dream that was my relationship with my ex?

Going through a divorce is one of the most challenging things you will do in your life, even when done respectfully.

You are now divorced, and suddenly reality hits. You come home from work, and there is no one to share the highs and lows of the day. You have to do things that your partner used to do and learn again how to do it. You want to go out for dinner, but who do you ask. Most of your recent friends are people you hung out with as couples.

You will need to make time to grieve. You have many questions and concerns that working through will help you begin letting go.

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8 Ways to Lovingly Experience Your Newly Empty Nest Without Losing Yourself in The Grief

/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/
8 Ways to Lovingly Experience Your Newly Empty Nest Without Losing Yourself in The Grief

You love your children. They grow up so fast, and you cannot imagine life without them. Then what seems like too soon, they are ready to move away from home for university, college, or a new job.

You are seeing them off at the airport. You go home with tears of love and sadness. You are already missing them. It is hard to come home to an empty nest.

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How to Build a Relationship with God that Feels Loving & Not Critical

/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/
How to Build a Relationship with God that Feels Loving & Not Critical

When you hear the word, God, what comes to your mind will depend on the values you learned from your parents.

If you grew up in a faith community that taught that God was angry, judgmental, and violent, you would have a hard time believing in a loving God.

Here are some steps on how to build a relationship with God.

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